#someone sent me money on cash app but i don't see it

[faeriemarie]

introducing my lifa app!!

so if you don't know what the lifa app is... here is my extremely confusing explanation. if you can't understand it, i don't blame you

the basics of my app:

The app is for pc, phone, ipad, and other electronic devices (or on paper in drs without smartphones)

It will automatically appear and it can not be deleted. I know everything there is to know about Lifa and I control the app with absolute ease.

If someone were to go on a device where the Lifa app is on, they wouldn’t be able to see it or tap on it at all. Only I can see it or use it and it is 100% real and 100% effective

The lifa app doesn’t take up ANY storage

Lifa knows exactly what I mean because it is connected to my subconscious mind. It knows what I mean exactly, and all intrusive thoughts are ignored

The lifa app doesn’t need wifi

I can do ANYTHING and I mean ANYTHING with Lifa, no restrictions, and nobody ever suspects that I’m using it

Nothing I search or watch on my lifa app is traceable by anyone but me (not even cell or wifi companies)

There are ZERO CONSEQUENCES to using Lifa and what decisions I make. Nothing goes wrong, everything happens how I expect it to, excluding the intrusive thoughts which are always ignored

No one is ever suspicious of the things I manifest and it’s like I’ve always had them (clothes, food, talents, etc. has always been there)

okay now for the features!!

lifa closet

Any item of clothing I choose from the catalog, script, or import a picture of will be sent to my closet, suitcase, or wherever I want

reality shifting

I can set a time and pick a reality to shift to. I will then shift during that exact time

reality check

I can check which reality I am in with the click of a button

scripter

I can script and write anything. Inserted images are HD, and PNG images remain transparent. I can insert infinite images and change the font’s color and style itself (same features as notes/notion/google docs but neater)

desired scenario

I can specifically script to describe my desired scenario. I can set the time and date to when the scenario happens. The scenario is exactly like how I want and even 1 trillion times better

manifestor

I can insert a picture or describe what I want to manifest. I can also manifest people by typing their name and Lifa will automatically recognize who they are. I can set the time and date to when you want that thing to manifest, and it will happen 100%.

skill increaser

Choose any skill I desire to have (I can also insert it by typing “cooking”). I can choose to master any skill and it will show up immediately. I can search any skill and increase on a scale of 1-100% mastery

motherlode (sims reference lol)

I can deliver/spawn money of any currency in my chosen form. (gift cards, bank acc, cash, etc.) I can choose from coins to bills. There is no limit amount of money or times to deliver it. I can deliver it how much and how many times I want. The money is 100% legal and valid, and passes all money detectors. The money has valid and legal coding, as if it had been made in factories. It still remains perfectly legal. I can choose to spawn the money in my purse, bottom of backpack, pockets, amazon, wallet, etc. The money spawns in 5 seconds. I can deliver/spawn as much money as I desire, there is no limit (even 50 million is 100% possible). There is 0% risk of money inflation

lifa credit card

The Lifa credit card has an infinite amount of money and can never go in debt. There is an infinite amount of money in all international currencies. The card is universal and 100% valid and legal. It can be used in any ATM and online store/game (could be recognized as any official credit card like eg. visa or ae). The money has no money or usage limit, and it can be used for anything, anytime. In ATM machines it appears that the card only has 1000€/$, but in the Lifa app it will be ∞ €/$. If the card gets lost, it will automatically disappear. The same happens if the card breaks, and Lifa will spawn a new card with the same exact info.  It will come inside a little gift box (that matches the app’s color scheme I desire) wherever I want. The card’s number and code (and other infos) are up to me or the universe but it's always 100% valid. The card lasts forever. There is 0% risk of money inflation

lifa bank account

The bank account feature is connected to the credit card feature. It’s almost like a normal bank acc. I can see all mytransactions. The amount of money never changes because it stays 100% infinite. I can change my money’s currency. I can also take money out of the card in my desired currency. I can customize the card’s design and I can spawn more cards. I can easily create more bank accounts too, they will all have infinite money. There is 0% risk of money inflation

lifa paypal/venmo/cashapp/etc.

It is 100% legal anywhere. It is exactly like the real paypal, but my Lifa bank account/card is registered. I can use it in all purchases that require paypal. I can login on the real paypal website with the Lifa paypal acc. When I first use the app I get to create a Lifa paypal account. The balance shows 1000€ / $ / £ but the money amount is infinite. There is 0% risk of money inflation

food delivery

If I insert a picture of a food item or search the catalog, Lifa will recognize. When I confirm, it will be sent to my ideal location. (i can pick the location). The food will be 100% fresh and new

boredom cure

Instantly provides me with inspiration to do something that is productive and beneficial to my overall well-being

create-a-person

I can design a person’s hair, body, face, etc., script their personality and choose their traits. It is set up like scripting and has different templates I can use. I can change skin tone, skin type, undertone, hair color, hair texture, eye color, etc. I can insert any pictures and they’ll be exactly how I want. When I insert a script of the person’s personality and behaviour, Lifa will recognize it. I can also script traits and the person’s backstory. I have to fill in each’s birth info (name, age, birthday, sign, blood type, etc) to my desire.  I can also choose the relationship between the people when I’m done creating them. Then I confirm and once I shift to my dr it will all be exactly like how I wanted and even 1 trillion times better. If I’m feeling lazy, I can select to let the universe fill in the gaps, and the universe will fill them like I wanted and even better

lifa messenger

I can text with anyone in the universe that I want. It feels completely real and all conversations are remembered. It’s like having online bestie because the people I text always get along with me, always respond, and actually care about me. We can also call and video chat. I am not actually communicating with someone from my reality and instead with the universe since everyone is part of the universe. It works exactly how I want it to

natal chart

I can select which life/reality’s natal chart I want to see. Lifa offers a personalized detailed description of my chart and personality. The chart is 100% accurate. I can also select to look at anyone’s natal chart. Lifa will show a list of everyone I know. It is divided in 5 categories (friends, family, acquaintances, classmates/coworkers, celebrities). The natal chart can also show compatibility

grade changer

Automatically makes me have good grades and changed all my past grades to A. My wrong test answers morph into correct test answers

ask-me-anything

I can ask anything and get the complete and 100% right answer. The questions can vary from asking where my lost tennis shoes are to what’s the answer to number 4 on my math homework. There is no limit to what can be asked and the answer given is always exactly what I need

feature adder

I can visualize and script more features and add them to Lifa with the feature adder. Lifa will add these features in 1 second and they will be 100% effective. Lifa also knows exactly what I mean, even if I script something wrong, so there are no surprises

lifaflix

A streaming site where I can watch shows that only exist in my dr (most of the time used for fame drs so i can see all the great acting projects i have been a part of). I can also watch my drs like tv shows.

lifatube

A video site set up like YouTube where I can watch anything from my dr. Things like fan edits, compilations of dr moments, my dr tiktoks, youtube videos made by my dr self and more. I can also watch memories/anything that happens from either a 3rd person point of view or 1st person

lifa socials

My lifa app has social media accounts from all my different realities that i can flip through, post from, dm with people from those realities, and go live (i can post anything i want on these social media sites and i’m immune to anything bad happening like leaking nudes, screenshots, hacking, or any other cybercrimes/bad things). My wr self even has their own account

[killmongerskeepermain]

Ghostface!Shuriri Headcanons

Surprise! Surprise! I got some headcanons for Ghostface!Shuriri for yall. Also I recreated a tag list so in case yall want to be tagged in anything, go ahead and fill out this form right here. ---> Taglist Form

Normal Lives

●👻● Outside her ghostface persona Riri is the perfect student. Still in college. 

●👻● Top of her class(of course), shows up on time, takes perfect notes, turns in work before the deadline, you name it. 

●👻● She doesn't mind doing work for her classmates. You want her to do your homework for you? It'll cost ya. (Her prices ain't cheap.)

●👻● Straight sneakerhead. Will make sure every outfit is tied together by the shoe.

●👻● Loves to go clubbing. Usually ends up with her finding a girl for her and Shuri for fuck around with if they're bored.

●👻● Despite her usually sticking to herself, no one truly has a problem with her. (If they do, RIP.)

●👻● Will talk her shit. Super sassy. Doesn't matter who you are or where ya live. Her slick mouth usually gets her in trouble. But ain't nobody gone jump with her partner a couple feet behind her.

●👻● Speaking of the partner, Shuri is the one who stays out of the limelight. 

●👻● She got away from Wakanda after T'Challa's passing. She believed he could be saved but that no one was trying hard enough. She dropped her duties as princess and went completely off the grid.

●👻● She spends most of her time in the lab under the house. Making new weapons, traps, home defenses. (She's still one of the smartest people on earth.) 

●👻● Also a sneakerhead. She's the one who likes to match shoes on a date.

●👻● Only goes clubbing so she doesn't have to hear Riri beg over and over again. 

●👻● Riri may be sassy but Shuri is MEAN. She does not give two fucks if she hurts your feelings. If you can't handle what she has to say then don't even look in her direction. 

●👻● If Riri has a problem with someone, so does Shuri. They're a package deal at this point. But if you're cool then you shouldn't have to worry about anything happening to you.

👻👻 "You know you was supposed to cash app me yesterday." Riri held a look of annoyance on her face as the football player fidgeted with his jacket. "Ah shit I forgot, $600 right?" She gave a small grin as she shook her head. "Nah, that was yesterday's price. It doubled since you forgot." His face fell and he bent down to mumble so his friends wouldn't hear. "$1200 is a little much don't you think?"

"Bet you won't forget again. I don't do this shit for free." She spat and he clenched his jaw. "What, are you gonna hit me pretty boy?" He steps closer to her before his eyes locked with another pair of brown orbs. "Is there a problem?" He quickly shook his head and sent Riri the money he owed before heading back to his friends. "I had it." The shorter girl grinned as she placed a kiss on Shuri's cheek. 

"Of course you did."

Behind The Mask

●👻● They don't just go around killing people for the hell of it. Their victims are usually people who did wrong by them or just don't deserve to live out their lives. Doing the world a favor.

●👻● Shuri uses a hunting knife with a sleek edge while Riri uses one with a ridged blade. 

●👻● Shuri is better when it comes to speed. She was training with her brother when he was alive. So if you manage to get away from Riri, you're not getting away from her. Loves the chase. Don't run. It only makes it more fun for her. "I love when they run."

●👻● Riri loves to play with their victims. Turns any chase into a game of cat and mouse. She also excels when it comes to stealth. She's the one who sneaks up on you when you're not looking. Can disappear in the blink of an eye. "Eyes on me ma."

●👻● Riri almost never has a messy kill. One clean cut is all it takes, hence her weapon of choice. Shuri on the other hand usually has some pent up aggression that she lets out during a kill. Not too much blood but just enough.

●👻● Won't let you see them in action. The only time was when you first met. But never again. The two agreed to keep everything ghostface related away from you. No matter how many times you ask. 

●👻● They did allow you to see them behind their ghostface personas only one time. The three of you drove to an abandoned building to show you how they hunt after endless begging. They even gave you a head start to run and hide. They made a bet on who would find you first with the loser making dinner. It didn't take long for Shuri to find you and to this day you and Riri wondered how she did it. 

👻👻 The only sound you heard was your own footsteps on the hard floor as you tried to be sneaky and find a good hiding spot. The building was long abandoned but still stood strong for a quick game of hide and seek. The two women gave you 10 minutes to hide and you had to admit your heart was racing. Quick, you say as you notice the cloak disappearing around the corner. You ducked under a nearby desk as one of them dragged into the room. You had a feeling it was Riri with how quiet they were. Even though they weren't going to hurt you, the thrill of it all sent jolts through your bones. When she left the room you took off down the hall with a wide grin. Time was almost up. Just before you could reach the doorway, a gloved hand grabbed your waist and you squealed. Looking up you saw Shuri take off her mask with a smirk. "How did you…..where did you come from!"

"What's the matter mamas? You look like you've seen a ghost."

When It Comes To You

●👻●Shuri is somewhat touch starved. So anytime you hug her from behind or snuggle up to her it makes her heart flutter. She eats it up.

●👻● Riri on the other hand loves having her hands on you. Whether it's holding your hand, grabbing your waist, or having you in her lap. 

●👻● They never let you go somewhere alone. If Riri can't be with you, Shuri is going and vice versa.

●👻● Riri is really big on PDA. Loves leaving small kisses and hickeys everywhere. Especially when someone hits on you while she's there. Shuri isn't into PDA like that but will not hesitate to pull you into a sloppy kiss if someone is bothering you. If it makes the other guy uncomfortable then it was worth it. 

●👻● Shuri gets jealous easily when it comes to you and Riri. That's where that sloppy kiss comes into play. And when you blush and hide your face in her neck, she's glaring at whoever is trying to shoot their shot. Also super territorial.

●👻● When you're alone they love to shower you in affection. Shuri loves running her fingers through your hair while Riri leaves trails of kisses along your shoulder. CUDDLE PUDDLE!

●👻● They will pamper you every chance they get when you're all together. Hugs? Kisses? Cuddles? Sex? They'll take care of you and all your needs. They will give you everything and anything you ask for.

●👻● Shuri teaches you and Riri Xhosa. You've learned that catching her off guard when switching languages flips a switch in her head. 

●👻● You're untouchable. No one in their right mind is going to lay a finger on you without lethal consequences. You want someone taken care of? Just say the word and they're gone.

●👻● They will not under any circumstances let you tag along for a kill. They would never put you through witnessing something as vile as them killing someone. Never again.

●👻● You definitely play with the voice changer. They have different ones but at this point you know who is who when they try to freak you out. 

👻👻 You tiptoed around the house trying to find your two girlfriend's with the small box in your hand. You found them on the couch watching Friday the 13th and grinned at the sight. Riri was lying under Shuri who had her arm over the girl's shoulder. You brought the box up to your lips and clicked the button. "Cuddling without me? How disrespectful." The two looked back at you before their laughter filled the room. "Girl, put that shit down and get over here." You sat down the voice changer and moved to lay your head down in Shuri's lap and your legs on Riri's. Though of course she couldn't keep her hands to herself and ended up between them. 🤭

[mother2monsters]

Serendipity in Seoul pt. 2

Prologue:

https://www.tumblr.com/mother2monsters/777678333890772992/title-is-a-work-in-progress?source=share

Disclaimer: Still don't know how to work Tumblr. I am on AO3 as well. Find me here: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BangtansNoona88/pseuds/BangtansNoona88

Without further ado..... lets go:

Back in Chicago, Destiny’s phone buzzed an hour later. She glanced at it, expecting another sympathy comment or Lyric’s nonsense. Instead, it was a DM—from a TikTok account with no profile pic, just a string of letters and numbers.

@RM94z: Saw your vid. You really wanna go to Korea that bad? I could make it happen.

Destiny snorted, rolling her eyes. “Another fake-ass sugar daddy,” she mumbled, tossing the phone aside. She’d gotten messages like this before—creeps offering to “paint her portrait” or send her Venmo for feet pics. She wasn’t falling for it. Cuz each time it was bullshit, but don’t judge a girl for trying.  Still, she screenshot it and sent it to Lyric.

“Look at this fool,” she typed. “I wish shit like this were real.”

Lyric’s reply was instant: “LMAO, tell him you need $5k and see what he says. Play along, girl.”

Destiny grinned, her petty streak kicking in. She slid back into the DMs, typing with all the femdom energy she could muster.

“Alright, ‘RM94z,’ if you’re serious, I need $5,000. Flight, hotel, concert ticket, skincare. Payment info in my bio. Show me how serious you are.”

She hit send, laughing to herself. “Ain’t no way,” she said aloud, already imagining the scammer’s lame excuse. Probably going to be like 'send me money first and then I’ll send it to you'. 'Whatever', she thought to herself. 

She refreshed her TikTok analytics—her video was at 2k views, not bad—when her phone chimed again. A payment notification.

$7,500 received from RM94z.

Destiny froze. Her heart slammed against her ribcage as she stared at the screen, the numbers glaring back at her like a fever dream. “What the fuck?” she whispered, her thumb trembling as she opened the app to confirm. It was real. Seven thousand five hundred dollars, sitting in her account, no strings, no note, just cold hard cash.

She scrambled back to TikTok, fingers shaking as she typed: “Who the hell are you?”

The reply came within minutes.

@RM94z: Someone who likes your energy. And maybe your stress ball technique. See you in Seoul?

Destiny’s fingers hovered over her phone, her breath caught somewhere between a scream and a laugh. $7,500. From some random TikTok account. RM94z. Her mind spun like a top—scammer? Sugar daddy? Namjoon himself? No, that last one was pure delulu, but the money was real. She could feel the sweat beading on her forehead as she reread the message: “Someone who likes your energy. And maybe your stress ball technique.”

“Oh, hell no,” she muttered, launching WhatsApp with the speed of a woman possessed. She voice-noted Lyric, her voice a frantic octave higher than usual. “Ric! Lyric! Girl, you will not believe this shit. That guy from TikTok? He just dropped seven thousand five hundred dollars into my account. Seven. Five. I said five grand as a joke, and he sent more! What the fuck do I do? Is this a prank? Am I about to get kidnapped? Call me!”

She hit send, then flipped to her group chat with Lyric and Nicole. Her thumbs flew across the screen.

Destiny: Y’ALL. EMERGENCY. Some dude on TikTok just sent me $7500 after I was playing on TikTok for Korea money. Look at this shit. [screenshot of payment] [screenshot of DMs]

Destiny: I’m losing my damn mind. Who is RM94z???

Her phone buzzed as Lyric’s call came through, her voice blasting before Destiny could even speak. “Bitch, WHAT? Seven grand? SEVEN GRAND? Who the hell is this man? Did you check if it’s real?”

“It’s real, Ric! It’s in my account! I’m staring at it!” Destiny paced her living room, nearly tripping over a pile of BTS photocards she’d been sorting for her TikTok shop. “I told him five thousand as a joke, and he sent more. What if it’s a scam? What if I spend it and the Feds show up?”

Lyric cackled, loud and unhinged. “Girl, if the Feds come, you tell ‘em some rich weirdo paid for your ass to get to Seoul. Nicole’s probably screaming in the chat right now.”

Destiny glanced at her phone as the group chat with Lyric and Nicole lit up.

Nicole: Bitch you manifested this. You squeezed that stress ball and the universe said “take my money”.

Nicole: $7500?? BOOK THE TRIP NOW.

Meanwhile, she flipped to her other group chat with Lyric, Stacy, and Lauren, dropping the same screenshots.

Destiny: Y’ALL I’M FREAKING OUT. TikTok dude sent me $7500. [screenshot of payment] [screenshot of DMs]

Stacy: Destiny WHAT THE FUCK?? Is this a sugar daddy or a BTS member?? RM94z… RM… NAMJOON???

Lauren: That’s flight, hotel, AND a new wig money. MEET US IN SEOUL!

Stacy: If this is real I’m quitting my job to beg on TikTok too.

“Ric, I’m losing it,” Destiny said, half-laughing, half-panicking. “What do I do? Do I message him back? Do I book the flight?”

“Yes, you message him, and yes, you book that damn flight!” Lyric barked. “You’re not missing Hobi’s concert—or the chance to see the members—over some ‘what if.’ Worst case, it’s a creep with cash. Best case, it’s Namjoon tryna get in your DMs. Either way, you’re going.”

Destiny exhaled hard, her heart still racing. “Okay. Okay, fine. I’m doing it.” She switched back to TikTok, staring at RM94z’s message. Her fingers trembled as she typed.

Destiny: Alright, first of all… thank you. For real. Money’s real, so I guess I’m Seoul-bound. Who are you really? And what’s with the extra $2500?

RM94z: Glad you’re coming. Extra’s for fun—buy something nice.

“Buy something nice?” Destiny muttered, incredulous.

“Who is this dude?”

But there was no time to overthink it. She opened her laptop, hands shaking as she searched for flights. Three days left meant prices were obscene, but with $7,500? She snagged a last-minute ticket to Seoul, departing in 36 hours, and she was still staying with Lyric cuz now she was low key scared she might get kidnapped. But YOLO. The rest she’d figure out later.

[guarmommy]

Artists Beware!

I had an unfortunate interaction with a user known as privfab8 (aka Phoenix Peter) on Instagram and I'm here to show why they're a liar and scammer. Every artist should be aware of them.

Privfab8 contacted me on Sunday, August 11th, and asked if I was open to doing art commissions, to which I replied yes. They wanted me to draw a cartoon portrait of their best friend, which I happily agreed to do. They later asked me how long it would take to complete a drawing and how much it would cost. I told them that a finished drawing usually takes me 4 days and a commission like this would cost between 15 and 25 dollars. I sent privfab8 a link to my Artistree page detailing all my commission prices. Everything started off normal and friendly. I didn't see anything wrong with this person at first glance.

Privfab8 asked me how I received my payment. I replied, Paypal. They explained that they do Cash App and Venmo but couldn't use both accounts because of a "dispute" so they offered to send me a check via bank app instead. Innocently, I agreed.

However, after that, things went downhill.

Privfab8 proposed they would give me a 100-dollar check and demanded whatever amount I had left to their niece. At that moment, I felt betrayed. I did not consent to any of this. I only wanted to do a commission for someone and get paid the amount I posted. But the person I thought was good turned out to be a liar and tried to trick me by overpaying me and giving money to a family member, playing me for a fool.

I submitted the finished drawing regardless, to prove I was the only honest person in the situation. I permanently ended the interaction by telling privfab8 that I wouldn't accept any future commissions and I would not take the check. Then I blocked them.

To any new artist who wants to do commissions, please be aware of people like privfab8. If you start feeling weird about someone, trust your intuition and don't interact with them. Block them. Report them if need be. I have learned my lesson the hard way and I'm sharing this experience with all of you so you all don't repeat the mistakes I made.

[onisiondrama]

"Onision LIVE #live #fyp #onisio." Onision, June 16, 2025

(only going over stuff I think is mildly interesting.)

Said he was going to protest YouTube, but they called him up personally asked him not to protest in front of YouTube headquarters. I believe this was when he was demonetized because he said they were evil for doing that.

Says he went to multiple therapists and one said he was fucked up so he never went to her again. He said that wasn't a nice thing to say to someone who was very depressed. Says therapy wasn't helpful for him.

Said Lucas is so-so and still suffering from PTSD from what Sarah did.

Says real victims don't want to go in front of a camera and make a TV show.

Says he didn't sue Sarah initially because he doesn't wish ill will on her.

Claims he made the crash out videos because he figured his life was over and made them to cash out and have fun. He made $10,000.

Says no one is complaining about the rating videos people are making on TikTok live because they are hypocrites. (I'll post about that later)

He said all of his crash out videos were classics.

He got banned from the airbnb app because he stayed in a house in one of those videos and pretended to pee on himself.

Says he works, but won't say what he does. Says it's not profitable to making content full time again.

He removed the crash out videos because he didn't want youtube making money off of them after he was demonetized.

He still didn't start his horror book.

He's streaming on YouTube, tiktok, instagram (this live didn't work?), twitter, kick, facebook all at the same time. (edit: Twitch as well)

Says Shiloh probably said what she said about him because of the profit potential because the last email she sent him was about how proud she was of her. (Just ignoring the years and years of you shit talking her online ??? And the time she had a manager reach out to stop talking about her?)

A log of Sarah stuff, but nothing new. The point he keeps making over and over is that he i claiming his story never changed and Sarah's did.

He finished writing half of his last book, but decided not to finish it. He says releasing it would be bad for the universe. He says it was very dark and about "unaliving". (Eyy he's learning about censoring his words on tiktok. Only took- years.)

He says because the NDA was in Washington state jurisdiction, "it's an argument for a future application."

He says he worked with Shane Dawson and Brandon Rogers and they both have a lot of anxiety and stress about their videos and how they'll be perceived. He didn't understand, he just wanted to have fun. Says maybe he should have cared more.

He says his whole extended family abandoned him. He thinks it's because of the news that came out about him and didn't try to talk to him about it. He says he proved to them it was false by showing them documents and they said it was about a different thing. He then starts talking about how he told family members they should feed their baby every time they cry and that came off bad to some people because of the context. (He's spoken about this before. It's because the baby passed away and he blamed them for not feeding their baby enough. Idk that seems like a reasonable reason to cut someone out of your life to me.)

He says he has zero support system from his family. He says his mom is supportive, but he has his opinions about that.

He wants to learn how to stream on rumble. - Forgot to write down before but he said something along the lines so many people online are millionaires and so many people know who he is and he hasn't figured out how to make money off of it.

Someone asked if he considers himself working class or living paycheck to paycheck. He says the job he has now he sees the results based on his efforts. He doesn't get something the first of every month, it's not simple.

[amnotaqueen]

Sending Money to Nigeria Without My Knowledge

So, now he has tried to clarify his calling our son fat. What he says now is that he actually means that our son has "no muscle." On what planet do you call a child fat because you think they need to build muscle? What sense does it make to discourage or prevent a child from eating and expect them to build muscle because of it? How does he think calorie restriction will build muscle? Why does he even expect a 7 year old boy to have a muscular build? I told him that if he wants our son to build muscle, the thing to do is to have him eat more protein. But he is the type of father who thinks that the men and adults get to eat lots of meat, but the children don't get any meat, or get only a sliver. So many times my son has asked for more meat, but he acts like all the meat is intended for him.

He talks like he thinks our son should act and think like an adult. Apparently, he thinks our son should look like an adult as well. My son made a mess eating at the table the other day, and my husband scolded him telling him, "You eat like a child!" Ummmm. Yeah. He is a child actually. And I don't know of any other 7 year old with a grown man physique.

A brother gave our son his old iPad. My husband set it up for him. I noticed that the messenger App on the iPad had notifications. When I opened the App, I saw that it was my husband's Facebook messenger account. I looked through some of his messages. He stays in contact with his friends and family in Nigeria. Some of them often ask for money. These are the Jehovah's Witness Nigerians that I met when I visited Nigeria. These are the ones who were aware that my husband had a girlfriend and was planning to discard me.

Not one of my Jehovah's Witness Nigerian brothers or sisters reached out to me (I also had Facebook account) to warn me or notify me. Not one of them did what we are taught to do. If someone is going down a scripturally immoral path leading to serious sin, they should be encouraged to seek help from the elders. If they do not, those who know should report it to the elders. This helps keep the person from committing serious sin and it keeps the congregation clean. My Nigerian brothers and sisters failed to do this.

They apparently opted to protect their beloved friend, knowing he was doing wrong. They may have tried to talk to him themselves to discourage him. However, these types of things should be reported to the elders so they can do their job, which is to help those who are spiritually weak, counsel, correct and discipline if necessary.

I know why some of them did not do what they should have done. My husband is in a position to send them money. They would not want to do anything that might cause him not to want to send them money.

My husband sends money to Nigeria without my knowledge. He has done this for years. I saw evidence on the ipad. He was quick to get separate bank accounts early in our marriage. I saw messages he sent to one Nigerian woman, seemed to be a Jehovah's Witness too, telling her how bad a wife I was. He told her that I didn't want him to carry $20 in his wallet, so that's why he opened a separate account.

He bent the truth into a lie. What happened was that I did see $20 in his wallet, and I asked why he could have spending cash but did not ever give me any spending cash. I never said he shouldn't have cash on him. My point was that I too should be allowed to have some extra spending cash. He didn't like that. He liked getting cash whenever he wanted to get cash for personal wants but didn't want me to get any cash to spend personally.

He also didn't want me to be keeping tabs on what he was doing with his money (not our money). Unbeknownst to me, he would begin sending money to Nigeria and he had no desire to discuss with me about any of it. This woman he lied to about me, was so sympathetic towards him. They talked negatively about me and American women in general. She expressed how sorry she was that he had to put up with such an unsubmissive wife.

He even told her that I had refused to have anymore children with him, which she thought was terrible of me. The fact is, we had so many problems when we got married that I stayed on birth control hoping we could sort through our problems before having a child. A couple years went by and we still had problems. My husband, of course, just wanted to have children, he didn't care about working on our problems. Being a newlywed, petrified at the prospect of a failed marriage especially so soon after being married, I agreed to get off birth control and got pregnant right away with our son. I thought, being pregnant with his child, having a child might cause him to treat me better, kinder. It absolutely did not. Before the pregnancy was bad, during the pregnancy was bad, and after the pregnancy it was still bad.

So, when he was talking about having another child, I thought he was crazy. Why should we bring another child into this nightmare of a family? Why was he thinking about another child, but not about fixing our relationship? My position was, fix the relationship first, then expand the family. Of course, he punished me for my stance. He did what narcs do, he bullied and emotionally abused me to get what he wanted. I just wanted to have a peaceful, loving family. I wanted us all to be a happy, Christian family. So, again, I did what I could to bring about peace, which was to get off birth control to try to conceive. I didn't know what narcissism was at that point in time. I had no clue what I was dealing with. I didn't know what else to do but to try to regain peace. So, I got off birth control.

Thankfully, I did not get pregnant again after years of being off birth control. Thank God. I'm glad not to share another child with him. Family life with him is misery. It is already hard on my son. We don't need anymore children. Because I didn't get pregnant again, he deluded himself into thinking that I lied to him and kept using birth control, thereby not giving him anymore children. Truth is, I was weak and dumb and did get off birth control. I simply did not get pregnant again. It is a blessing.

So, he lied to his Nigerian female friend. She too was looking for him to give her some money as she was trying to get married. So she said something like, 'I'm so sorry you have an awful wife. Those American women are not how the Bible says women should be...Can I have $50?'

[inkshadow]

dax doesn't even bother to address the money situation anymore, hellbent on not taking anything from her especially when the argument clearly stems from something else. it's his saving grace that she's not sent him anything through cash apps and the like, otherwise she could put a pin in this with a few taps of her phone. "you sure that's not what you're saying? do you even know what you're saying right —" the light press to his chest does nothing to faze him; in fact, it makes him laugh that she thought such a feeble attempt would get her anywhere. with tessa, words will always cut deeper than anything physical and something tells him that would still ring true if she stabbed him right then and there. "what the hell is so wrong with feeling bad for someone who clearly isn't happy with how things are?!" her dad, mainly, but surely that's just part of the whole problem. is that also why she didn't care to apply herself in med school? "this isn't charity, i'm just bein' fucking honest which is something you can't even do for yourself!" even though their upbringing places them in two totally different worlds, there's one thing that dax feels she can see eye-to-eye on. "we're all alone in this fucked up world, tess — you and me. and if you can't accept that your god damn asshole of a dad isn't gonna pick you up if you end up in a ditch somewhere, i don't know what to tell you!"

"then consider the thousand as an advance, and i'll call you the next time someone's bothering me!" she throws her hands up with frustration, not entirely sure why it matters to her so much that he take the money. sure, it is only pocket change to a hawkins, but it's more than that. if he doesn't take it, then it's admitting last night was just about... spending time together. having fun without the pretense of some excuse for it. and tessa can't have that. can't allow herself to admit that she might like dax. because they're from two totally different worlds, and while he may have said some nice things to her, he still hates her. right? shoots him another eye roll, because of course he'd focus on the toilet. "that's not what i'm saying, dumbass." so what is she saying? her brain might be too fuzzy for logic. it's not too fuzzy for anger, though, eyes widening when he admits it, small frame launching forward to push pathetically at his chest. "well don't! i don't need your fucking pity, dax. this isn't some reverse charity bullshit." breath quickens with adrenaline and fear, because she doesn't like how close he is to the truth. "fuck off, my situation is fine!"

[whyareweallawakerightnow]

Friday sucks too

Yesterday was annoying. Im trying hard to not let it but ut is. Its annoying. I did go to lunch with my nephew and he did make me smile. Im suppose to watch him later so we'll see if he behaves.

I took pics of him and I and posted them on Facebook, he liked the post pretty early in the morning for him. I guess he's still not sleeping. That either means something or someone is keeping him up. I just can't think about it. It makes me cringe.

I did request money from him on cash app for Myras food and said in the caption "for mj food" then he sends me a message saying 'Lol does mrs myra need food?" I'm like ???????? Duh? I just said 'Yep.' He then says "okie dokie, sent it" I say "thanks"

That was it. That was all.

Im really trying this law of attraction thing where I remove my energy from him, to choose happiness, I keep telling myself I'm not going to let this sink me. Truth is tho, it might be. Im trying hard not to let it tho.

I did unfollow him on Facebook but I still got a notification that he posted something. I was annoyed. My friends say I need to unfriend him. It would probably make it easier but I just don't have the heart right now. Maybe I will as time goes on.

I just really hate the way this feels, i mean I know it's supposed to feel this way but I just didn't think this would happen. I guess I'm just dumb in that way. I just thought he would miss me and he hasn't. That's a gut punch.

All I can do is love myself and myra through it. As best I can. This is just really hard.

[cyanocitta-blattidae]

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